Big changes in a short timespan

On Friday, we placed Toby's carrier inside a wire dog crate so that he could have water, the paper bags he's currently using for elimination, and his sleeping spot all together in a safe place. He's not drinking the water, though he does tip it over frequently, but he uses everything else.

He is growing fast, and his behavior changes every few hours. He has few habits right now--everything is fluid. Everything we'd learned to expect is shifting. He has taken to sleeping on top of the carrier rather than inside it. Just now, he went to sleep on the back of the couch. He stirs every few minutes because he's not used to sleeping out in the big world and every noise makes him want to check where Mama is, but it's where he wants to be.

This morning he ate off his plate rather than from my hand. That's a big step in growing up. Soon he will learn to drink from a bowl and eat kibble, and the night feedings will go away. I'll be relieved and a little sad. I don't expect to do this again, so I'm counting last times as well as first times.

It's an incredible privilege to raise a tiny life from near birth--and near-death, several times--and watch that life grow. It's also been exhausting. Most of what we planned to do this summer didn't happen, and I got sick and missed a week of work because I got sick after six weeks of kitten care and limited sleep. Matt is very tired, too; he's been sleeping less than I have. I'm happy about what we did, wouldn't trade Toby for anything on earth, but I have a lot of making up to do around the house, garden, and at work.

Tomorrow we go to the doctor to find out whether his illness is really gone. All this musing may be premature, but he's so strong and growing so fast it's hard to believe there could still be something wrong.